Stand Against SuicideI know the pain is perhaps unbearable,Stand Against Suicide by MikkiMarie
But darling, please put down the blade.
Release your emotions through tears and smiles,
Rather than dreading these days.
Do it for the little girl, whose mother can’t be there,
Or for the boy whose father drank too much.
For the boy who can’t sit in elementary school,
Because the bruises from Daddy hurt to touch.
For the teenage girl lying face down in her bed,
Thinking, why can’t it all be done?
For the elderly man looking up at the stars,
Counting the days one by one.
Do it for the children who wonder, does it end?
For the ones who feel left on their own.
For the ones who think, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
If I didn’t feel so left alone.
And finally, do it for one other person,
The person in front of these words.
Because you’ll never know how it gets better
When focusing on pain and hurt.
Live one more day, dear, for them and for you,
And I swear to you, problems will fade.
I know, for right now, it’s p
Im here. Im living. Im fighting. My art is my therapy. ♥|
Cuddle craver. Music maniac. Film fanatic. Art adorer. Serious studier. Pro Procrastinator. Soulmate seeker. Headphone hoarder. Laptop lover. Amazingly affectionate. Comfortably curvy. Incredibly imaginative. Secretly shy.
So, midway through summer break, it’s my birthday next week, I have my official 6th form college form and interview with my new form tutor which is the 4th of September and classes start on the 8th. Things seem to be coming together yet still falling apart.
My two youngest brothers (I am the eldest of 5 children) have gone to live with my mother, it’s only a 20 minute drive away and once they stop their childish endeavours I’m sure my parents will be able to figure something out, saying that this divorce is coming up nearly 2 years now and they feel the need to act like 2 year olds.
I’m doing okay, I’m seeing my therapist, art therapist, once a week as I have been for the past and whilst I know counselling can go pear shaped, especially for people who find it difficult to sit down in a room and talk about their problems, like me, it’s the best thing that ever happened to me.
Friends, isn’t really happening, I’ve been quite lonely since I left school, I had my prom, but that was a month ago and I haven’t been out with anyone since, I tried to make contact with a few friends last week but was very quickly brushed off and then saw they all went out together and now I get too anxious to talk to anyone. I never was one to be invited.
I now have Netflix which is a blessing, it makes the days go faster, I don’t spend so much time moping around, thinking, walking through fields around the village, I can disconnect from my life and go through TV series one at a time which is working splendidly, break from reality.
I have no inspiration to write or draw, I’m half way through a painting but have run out of paint, and will have to wait for my birthday to get some more. I am trying to get through the block, but these things take time I guess and I’m not overly stressed about it right now, Netflix is here for me.
I can’t wait for this school year to start, to start my A levels, and get on my way to university, saying that, I have results day coming up soon… oh dear, was trying to forget about that, oops, absolutely terrified, 23 exams in the space of 4 weeks, with each one being a minimum of an hour and the longest being 2.5 hours, it nearly killed me… but it’s over now and I made it in one piece
I’m 6 weeks SH free, getting there, it’s hard to find the happiness, it’s hard to see light sometimes, there’s still a long way to go and I’m tired, but I have 5 weeks left of summer break and a much needed break at that. Quiet for now, don’t really feel like people, people are hard to deal with right now, as a generic statement, Charly is in shut down mode, I’m worn out.
But Im doing okay.
Stay strong my friends,